With This Ring...

Rings are always a Big Deal in weddings, whether you're talking about the engagement ring or the wedding ring. A standard has developed, as well. There is the awesome and gorgeous engagement ring, and then you buy a wedding band that, while beautiful, is really a supplement to the engagement ring itself. After the wedding, you'll have a beautiful pair of rings, right?

Well, for me... wrong.

My parents divorced when I was very young; to the point where I don't even remember them together. My dad remarried before I turned 6, so I've always had my stepmother in my life. I remember when I was living with her and my dad that I just loved her wedding ring. She only had one ring she wore; she did not have a ring and a band. I remember looking at it and loving the simplicity of it.

Now, don't get me wrong, Mr. JeffM proposed with a gorgeous ring, but I've always had this nagging voice in the back of my head vying for a singular wedding ring. The wedding ring should be special. While I love engagement rings (C'mon, what girl doesn't?), it's the wedding and a marriage you're working toward, and the ring that symbolizes that should be the centerpiece. It really bugged me that for some people the wedding ring is a mere afterthought.

(That said, if you disagree, that's fine! It's a personal decision, and I'll still be oogling your rings. Plus, I don't like ketchup or tomato sauces on pasta, so really my viewpoints are untrustworthy.)

After making the decision to go ahead with one wedding ring instead of a traditional wedding band, I started researching. I wanted something classic, but a little bit different. I wanted a sapphire because Mr. JeffM loves sapphires (well, anything blue really), and I wanted it to be a ring that represented us. And then I found it.

I placed the order. Lo and behold, on Christmas Eve (via Fedex) it arrived...

Merry Christmas, right? It is a sapphire and diamonds set in white gold. And can I just say how hard it is to have this beauty sitting in our apartment, and I can't wear it yet? I have to keep resisting the urge to "try it on to make sure it fits right" on an almost daily basis.

Needless to say, I'm very happy, and I cannot wait to start wearing it.

and it begins..

..the post-holiday wedding frenzy, I mean. I've been imagining all this time that once the holidays went by, that's when I'd really start feeling the pressure - and it's pretty true! No huge stress yet but it's getting to be that time where things I've been putting off for another day simply cannot be put off any longer. Like booking the rehearsal dinner! I imagined I'd get that done around November, maybe December. Uhh woops.

Also I've been having the darndest time with the wedding bands. Mr. Fairfax picked out a great titanium one on etsy (the one pictured is 9mm, we got it 5mm and it's awesome), and had his finger sized (at Macy's), so I went ahead and ordered it with engraving (knowing full well that I could not exchange it for a different size if I had it engraved)..... and it's too big. Just by a little bit but it flops all around on his finger, I'm sure that's not ideal. Sooooo we have to buy a new one! And we'll save the one that's a bit too big for when he fleshes out a bit in his old age. ;)

That by itself didn't bother me too much. My own hunt for the perfect ring just isn't going even as well as that. Originally I imagined that I would like a little sparkle on my wedding band and it would be easy to pick it out, I just wanted something like this. But then I tried something like that on in a store and it didn't look quite right. So then I went for something entirely different and tried this one. And it looks Ridiculous with my ring. Looks great by itself but I want to continue wearing my engagement ring so now I have to return that one. Then I found this one on etsy and thought it would be perfect -

(seababejewelry)

and then it arrived and it's wayyy too thin and looks wonky (my engagement ring is just under 2mm thick, this one is I think just under 1mm thick, so it just makes my engagement ring look kind of clunky). SO.

I didn't expect the wedding band search to stress me out at all, but it's actually really upsetting me. The wedding band is important. Maybe more important than the engagement ring, for the symbolism it represents. Is anyone else having a hard time with this? Totally should have just picked out a set instead of the engagement ring by itself!

UPDATE: The folks at seababejewelry are giving me a 100% credit if I return the ring, and they're making one exactly to my specifications that should only cost a bit more than the original one I bought. So that's good news. Also, titaniumknights, who made mr. fairfax's ring, is giving me the engraving for free on the redo. Sooo that's something too. If you're ever unhappy with something you've ordered on etsy, always ask them (nicely) if they'll fix it! Usually what I order is exactly what I wanted, but every time it hasn't been quite right, the vendor always works hard to make exactly what I want.

longest day ever?

is it just me or is this day/week crawling by?? wow.

I am so giddy about booking the officiant. She's on vacation right now but she'll be back next week and will email us our "homework" - a packet for us to go through to help us narrow down our ideas for the ceremony. I'll share it with you when I see it!

I've always been for traditional vows but this post gives a compelling argument for writing your own. And some other great advice! I still think I'll never be able to express myself well enough but that seems like a common concern and in the end, for some, the words just come out right.

Thanks Miss National Harbor for bringing up the matching-ring issue. I have a white gold engagement ring but I've fallen for a palladium wedding band.. I'm not sure yet if I care if they're slightly mismatched.. No idea yet what Mr. Fairfax will choose, could be something like this, or maybe like this, or who knows.

With this ring...

This weekend marks the 2 months to go date. It's also my first bridal shower - expect pictures - which has caused me to...vehemently stalk my registries. You can scold me now.

This week, we HAVE to get our last vendors. I'm getting my hair highlighted one last time, and then it's on a mad dash to find a stylist for the wedding day (any suggestions??). I have a DJ I need to call back, and we need to find a limo/bus.

Did I mention invitations are being sent out? We're printing out RSVP cards as we speak. They look fab.

But what I really wanted to blog about was showing off pictures of my lovely wedding band that we paid off this weekend.



My wedding band is a platinum band with about 1/4 carat channel set diamonds. I absolutely adore my band, it fits perfectly with my e-ring and was incredibly reasonably priced.

Mr. GP's band is white gold - we're finalizing it this weekend but all in all, we stayed pretty close to our budget. My band was an estate band and fiance's is a new band though. Apparently white gold is incredibly similar to platinum which is what we were originally considering.

What did you end up picking out for your wedding band? Are you happy with it??

You have the ring on....now it won't come off!!

As a nearlywed with a ring that is just about a size too big, there has been much discussion about what size to get it cut down to. Its a 3 3/4 (that's what I was originally measured for) and its huge! Nola of Doubet Jewelers in Wilmington, DE (where we got the ring) recommends cutting it down to an even size 3. My concern is what to do on days that my fingers swell?? (which often happens due to humidity.) Her comment was "Well you just won't take it off that day!" Of course, I panicked, thinking what if my finger swells so much that it gets stuck and for some reason I need to take it off - like I want to work out, garden, etc. She had a great tip for this - Windex!! So, in doing a little research about what to do when a ring gets stuck, I found this great post in Wiki-How. They offer many ideas including window cleaner, dental floss, cooking shortening, among others. Have this problem too? What's your favorite solution?